Sadness

“When sadness comes, be really sad.  Don’t try to escape from it – allow it, cooperate with it.  Let it dissolve in you and you be dissolved in it.  Become one with it.  Be really sad: no resistance, no conflict and no struggle.  When happiness comes, be happy: dance and be ecstatic.  When happiness comes, don’t try to cling to it.  Don’t say that it should remain always and always; that is the way to miss it.  When sadness comes, don’t say, ‘Don’t come to me,’ or, ‘If you have come, please go soon.’ That is the way to miss it.  Don’t reject sadness and don’t cling to happiness.” ~ Osho, The Art of Living and Dying

“Sadness has a song… a very deep phenomenon is sadness.  Accept it.  Enjoy it.  Taste it without any rejection, and you will see that it brings many gifts to you which no happiness can ever bring.  If you can accept sadness it is no longer sadness; you have brought a new quality to it.  You will grow through it.  Now it will not be a stone, a rock on the path blocking the way; it will become a step.” ~ Osho, The Art of Living and Dying

“Sadness is sad because you dislike it.  The sadness is sad because you would not like to be in it.  The sadness is sad because you reject it.  Even sadness becomes a flowering of tremendous beauty, of silence and of depth, if you like it.  Happiness is always shallow; sadness, always deep.  Happiness is like a wave; sadness is like the innermost depth of an ocean.  In sadness you remain with yourself, left alone.  In happiness you start moving with people and you start sharing.  In sadness you close your eyes and you delve deep within yourself.” ~ Osho, The Art of Living and Dying

“Whenever you feel sad, sit by the side of a tree, by the side of the river, by the side of a rock, and just relax into your sadness without any fear.  The more you relax, the more you will become acquainted with the beauties of sadness.  Then sadness will start changing its form; it will become a silent joy, uncaused by anybody outside you.  That will not be shallow happiness, which can be taken away very easily.  And getting deeper into your aloneness, one day you will find not only joy – joy is only midway.  Happiness is very superficial, depends on others; joy is in the middles, does not depend on anyone.  But going deeper you will come to the state of bliss – that’s what I call enlightenment.” ~ Osho, Love, Freedom, Alonenss: The Koan of Relationships

The Egg-Timer Technique – How to Limit the Time You Spend Experiencing Sadness, Anger, and Self-Pity.

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The following is an excerpt from Get Off Your “But” by Sean Stephenson.

—— —— ——

My parents never formally studied a word of psychology, yet they instinctively knew that if I focused too long on a negative aspect of my life, I would only make it worse.  They also knew they couldn’t deny me the experiences of sadness, anger, and self-pity, because I would merely repress the feelings and express them in some destructive way later.  So they came up with an ingenious solution.

If they caught me feeling sorry for myself, they would say, “Sean, if you want to feel sorry for yourself, that’s totally okay.” They would then go to the kitchen, rustle around in the pantry, and return with an egg timer and this instruction: “However, Sean, today you only get fifteen minutes.  Ready?  Go!”  And the egg timer would click off the minutes.

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“In my years of traveling the world, I’ve heard hundreds of tear-filled stories.  I’ve hugged complete strangers as they’ve sobbed in my arms.  I always whisper the same thing to them: ‘Look for the gift in your pain.’  If you look for that gift, believe me, you will find it.  If you don’t look, it’s all too easy to become enslaved by your misery.” ~ Sean Stephenson, Get Off Your “But”

“Sadness gives depth. Happiness gives height. Sadness gives roots. Happiness gives branches. Happiness is like a tree going into the sky, and sadness is like the roots going down into the womb of the earth. Both are needed, and the higher a tree goes, the deeper it goes, simultaneously. The bigger the tree, the bigger will be its roots. In fact, it is always in proportion. That’s its balance.” ~ Osho

 

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