“Fairness is an illusion. Fairness never existed and never will. No one in life gets less or more than anyone else. We just get different stuff. That’s right. No one is dealt a bad or a good hand in life; we’re just dealt cards. It’s up to us to stay in the game and play. Sure, some cards look “better,” but they’re really not. If you look closely, you’ll see that anything you feel has been taken from you – or never given to you at all – was replaced with other amazing opportunities and gifts. It’s up to you to find them.” ~ Sean Stephenson, Get Off Your “But”
“In my years of traveling the world, I’ve heard hundreds of tear-filled stories. I’ve hugged complete strangers as they’ve sobbed in my arms. I always whisper the same thing to them: ‘Look for the gift in your pain.’ If you look for that gift, believe me, you will find it. If you don’t look, it’s all too easy to become enslaved by your misery.” ~ Sean Stephenson, Get Off Your “But”
Rambha (family servant) had given [Mohandas K.] Gandhi an enchanting image to describe the power of mantra. She compared the practice of mantra to the training of an elephant. “As the elephant walks through the market,” taught Rambha, “he swings his trunk from side to side and creates havoc with it wherever he goes – knocking over fruit stands and scattering vendors, snatching bananas and coconuts wherever possible. His trunk is naturally restless, hungry, scattered, undisciplined. This is just like the mind – constantly causing trouble.”
“Consider every thought you have as a suggestion, not an order. Right now, my mind is suggesting that I feel tired. It is suggesting that I give up. It is suggesting that I take an easier path. If I pause for a moment, however, I can discover new suggestions. My mind is also suggesting that I will feel very good about accomplishing this work once it is done. It is suggesting that I will respect the identity I am building when I stick to the schedule. It is suggesting that I have the ability to finish this task, even when I don’t feel like. Remember, none of these suggestions are orders. They are merely options. I have the power to choose which option I follow.” ~ James Clear, Blog
In our own lives, having a mind-set of expecting to win increases our odds of winning. It helps us get better results. And better results help us increase our credibility and self-confidence, which leads to more positive self-expectancy, and more winning – and the upward cycle continues. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
As Harvard Business School professor and writer Rosabeth Moss Kanter has observed, “Confidence consists of positive expectations for favorable outcomes… winning begets winning, because it produces confidence at four levels.” The first of those levels, she says, is “self-confidence: an emotional climate of high expectations.” The second level is “confidence in one another.”
So if you want to increase your results, expect to win – not only for yourself, but also for your team. Not at all costs, but honorably. Not at the expense of others, but in conjunction with others. Expecting to win – and expecting others to win – is a fundamental approach of helping to bring it about.
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“The art of thinking is the greatest art of all, for ‘as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.’ The thinker knows he is today where his thoughts have taken him and that he is building his future by the quality of the thoughts he thinks.” ~ Wilfred Peterson, The Art of Living