“When you enter a mindset, you enter a new world. In one world – the world of fixed traits – success is about proving you’re smart or talented. Validating yourself. In the other – the world of changing qualities – it’s about stretching yourself to learn something new. Developing yourself. In one world, failure is about having a setback. Getting a bad grade. Losing a tournament. Getting fired. Getting rejected. It means you’re not smart or talented. In the other world, failure is about not rowing. Not reaching for the things you value. It means you’re not fulfilling your potential. In one world, effort is a bad thing. It, like failure, means you’re not smart or talented. If you were, you wouldn’t need effort. In the other world, effort is what makes you smart or talented. You have a choice. Mindsets are just beliefs. They’re powerful beliefs, but they’re just something in your mind, and you can change your mind.” ~ Carol Dweck, Mindset
“The attempt to avoid legitimate suffering lies at the root of all emotional illness.” ~ Scott Peck, The Road Less Traveled
There is the story of a young martial arts student who was under the tutelage of a famous master.
One day, the master was watching a practice session in the courtyard. He realized that the presence of the other students was interfering with the young man’s attempts to perfect his technique.
The master could sense the young man’s frustration. He went up to the young man and tapped him on his shoulder.
“What’s the problem?” he inquired.
Borrowing strength builds weakness is a concept that hit close to home with me with the passing of my 104 year old great-grandmother. Her legacy for me was one of complaining less, doing as much as you can on your own, and loving more. She endured more challenges in her life than most ever will and yet never stopped loving with every fiber of her being. Her story and her legacy is one that will forever remain close to my heart. You can read my full reflection on her legacy here.
Get Off Your “But”
Book Overview: In addition to presenting Sean Stephenson’s unbelievable life story, Get Off Your “But,” offers anyone who needs to conquer fears and insecurities a hands-on guide for overcoming the forces of negativity and self-sabatoge. Sean – a successful psychotherapist – shows what it takes to overcome the big bumps in the road, eliminate excuses, end insecurities, and ultimately stand up for happiness and success in life. Click here for more info!
Post(s) Inspired by this Book: Quotes from Book /// Taking Out The Trash; Understanding the Difference Between Living at Cause and Living at Effect. /// Words Can Heal, and Words Can Kill /// Connecting Through Conversational Ping-Pong /// The Egg-Timer Technique – How to Limit the Time You Spend Experiencing Sadness, Anger, and Self-Pity.
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“Fairness is an illusion. Fairness never existed and never will. No one in life gets less or more than anyone else. We just get different stuff. That’s right. No one is dealt a bad or a good hand in life; we’re just dealt cards. It’s up to us to stay in the game and play. Sure, some cards look “better,” but they’re really not. If you look closely, you’ll see that anything you feel has been taken from you – or never given to you at all – was replaced with other amazing opportunities and gifts. It’s up to you to find them.” ~ Sean Stephenson, Get Off Your “But”
“In my years of traveling the world, I’ve heard hundreds of tear-filled stories. I’ve hugged complete strangers as they’ve sobbed in my arms. I always whisper the same thing to them: ‘Look for the gift in your pain.’ If you look for that gift, believe me, you will find it. If you don’t look, it’s all too easy to become enslaved by your misery.” ~ Sean Stephenson, Get Off Your “But”
Rambha (family servant) had given [Mohandas K.] Gandhi an enchanting image to describe the power of mantra. She compared the practice of mantra to the training of an elephant. “As the elephant walks through the market,” taught Rambha, “he swings his trunk from side to side and creates havoc with it wherever he goes – knocking over fruit stands and scattering vendors, snatching bananas and coconuts wherever possible. His trunk is naturally restless, hungry, scattered, undisciplined. This is just like the mind – constantly causing trouble.”