Empathy

Bringing A Child With Autism to the Theater? This Reaction Might Surprise You.

Bringing A Child With Autism to the Theater? This Reaction Might Surprise You.

The following is an excerpt from the book, How To Live A Good Life by Jonathan Fields.

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“I am angry and sad,” Kelvin Moon Loh’s Facebook post began.  “Just got off stage from today’s matinee and yes, something happened.  Someone brought their autistic child to the theater.”

Loh was in the Broadway cast of The King and I, and a mom came to see the show with her son, who was apparently autistic.  During an intense moment Loh described as “the whipping scene,” the child yelped and then, according to reports, became inconsolable.  Loh wrote, “His voice pierced the theater.  The audience started to rally against the mother and her child to be removed.  I heard murmurs of ‘Why would you bring a child like that to the theater?'”

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“There is one aspect to our experience of suffering that is of vital importance.  When you are aware of your pain and suffering, it helps you to develop your capacity for empathy, the capacity that allows you to relate to other people’s feelings and suffering.  This enhances your capacity for compassion towards others.  So as an aid in helping us connect with others, it can be seen as having value.” ~ Dalai Lama, The Art of Happiness

“In cultivating compassion we draw from the wholeness of our experience – our suffering, our empathy, as well as our cruelty and terror.  It has to be this way.  Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded.  It’s a relationship between equals.  Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others.  Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.” ~ Pema Chödrön

Why You Should Make What’s Important To Others Important To You, And How.

Why You Should Make What's Important To Others Important To You, And How.

Have you ever gone up to somebody important to you in your life with exciting news only to have that person disregard what you were saying and brush it off as ‘unimportant?’

It doesn’t feel good does it?

The mastery mindset for this week is that:  Importance is subjective and if you want to have the best relationships, you have to learn how to extend ‘importance’ outside of your own little world.

What you feel is important might not feel all that important to another person, just like what another person feels is important might not feel all that important to you.

Why is that?

It’s because each individual decides what’s important to them (whether consciously or subconsciously) based on their unique set of life experiences, characteristics, morals, values, and priorities – all of which play a pivotal role in determining importance. Continue reading

His Mom served burnt toast, but he was shocked when his Dad said this.

His Mom Served Burnt toast , but he was shocked when his Dad said this.

“One night that stood out in my mind is when my mom had made dinner for us after a very long and rough day at work – she placed a plate of jam and extremely burned toast in front of my dad.

Not slightly burnt but completely blackened toast.

I was just waiting to see if anyone noticed the burnt toast and say anything. But Dad just ate his toast and asked me if I did my homework and how my day was. I don’t remember what I told him that night, but I do remember hearing my mom apologizing to dad for burning the toast. And I’ll never forget what he said:

“Sweetie, I love burned toast.”

Later that night, I went to tell my dad good night and ask him if he really liked his toast burned. He put his arm on my shoulder and said,

“Your momma put in a very long day at work today and she was very tired. And besides, A burnt toast never hurts anyone but you know what does? Harsh words!”

Then he continued to say “You know, life is full of imperfect things and imperfect people I’m not the best at hardly anything, and I forget birthdays and anniversaries just like every other human. What I’ve learned over the years, is that learning to accept each others faults and choosing to celebrate each other’s differences, is one of the most important keys for creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship. Life is too short to wake up with regrets. Love the people who treat you right and have compassion for the ones who don’t.”

Enjoy Life Now.

“A man of understanding, a man who understands himself and others, always feels compassion. Even if somebody is an enemy you have compassion toward him because a man of understanding can understand the viewpoint of the other also. He knows why the other feels as he feels, he knows why the other is angry, because he knows his own self, and in knowing that, he has known all others.” ~ Osho, The Book of Understanding

 

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