“If we become angry at our anger, we will have two angers at the same time.  We only have to observe it with love and attention.  If we take care of our anger in this way, without trying to run away from it, it will transform itself.  This is peacemaking.  If we are peaceful in ourselves, we can make peace with our anger.  We can deal with depression, anxiety, fear, or any unpleasant feeling in the same way.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh, Peace is Every Step

“Eventually, happiness was just a speck on the horizon, way off in the distance.  The closer I got, the farther I had to go.  Turns out that I’d been running as fast as I could in the wrong direction.  Oops.  The stuff wasn’t doing its job; it wasn’t making me happy.  Depression set in when I no longer had time for a life outside of work, laboring eighty hours a week just to pay for the stuff that wasn’t making me happy.  I didn’t have time for anything I wanted to do: no time to write, no time to read, no time to relax, no time for my closest relationships.  I didn’t even have time to have a cup of coffee with a friend, to listen to his stories.  I realized that I didn’t control my time, and thus I didn’t control my own life.  It was a shocking realization.” ~ The Minimalists, Everything That Remains

“We often seem to value activity above all else, but like all beings we need to rest and recuperate.  I suspect the widespread occurrence of depression in our culture is linked to our refusal to allow ourselves quiet time.  Feeling the need to remain constantly busy – mentally or physically – in socially productive activity can prevent us from turning inward to simply be with ourselves.  Such inward turning requires time and might lower productivity and social standing.  It is not that all activity is bad, but many of us are far out of balance and our activity does not come from a place of stillness and wisdom.” ~ Robert Kull, Solitude

“The strong sensations we generally label as pain are inherent to living, but we can work with the quality of our experience in relation to these sensations.  If we resist them, our resistance actually intensifies the sensations and thus creates additional pain.  Another common way we intensify pain is by taking it personally and having a ‘why me?’ attitude.  If we can relax into pain as a natural part of living that everyone experiences, and let go of the self-judgment that something is wrong with me because I’m experiencing pain, we can alleviate our suffering to a large degree. Much of our suffering is caused by attachment to our sense of a separate autonomous ‘I’ that can somehow achieve a permanent state of affairs with only pleasure and no pain.” ~ Robert Kull, Solitude

“Sadness is sad because you dislike it.  The sadness is sad because you would not like to be in it.  The sadness is sad because you reject it.  Even sadness becomes a flowering of tremendous beauty, of silence and of depth, if you like it.  Happiness is always shallow; sadness, always deep.  Happiness is like a wave; sadness is like the innermost depth of an ocean.  In sadness you remain with yourself, left alone.  In happiness you start moving with people and you start sharing.  In sadness you close your eyes and you delve deep within yourself.” ~ Osho, The Art of Living and Dying

The Egg-Timer Technique – How to Limit the Time You Spend Experiencing Sadness, Anger, and Self-Pity.

The following is an excerpt from Get Off Your “But” by Sean Stephenson.

—— —— ——

My parents never formally studied a word of psychology, yet they instinctively knew that if I focused too long on a negative aspect of my life, I would only make it worse.  They also knew they couldn’t deny me the experiences of sadness, anger, and self-pity, because I would merely repress the feelings and express them in some destructive way later.  So they came up with an ingenious solution.

If they caught me feeling sorry for myself, they would say, “Sean, if you want to feel sorry for yourself, that’s totally okay.” They would then go to the kitchen, rustle around in the pantry, and return with an egg timer and this instruction: “However, Sean, today you only get fifteen minutes.  Ready?  Go!”  And the egg timer would click off the minutes.

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“The opposite of play is not work – the opposite of play is depression.  Respecting our biologically programmed need for play can transform work.  It can bring back excitement and newness to our job.  Play helps us deal with difficulties, provides a sense of expansiveness, promotes mastery of our craft, and is an essential part of the creative process.  Most important, true play that comes from our own inner needs and desires is the only path to finding lasting joy and satisfaction in our work.  In the long run, work does not work without play.” ~ Dr. Stuart Brown

“Sadness gives depth. Happiness gives height. Sadness gives roots. Happiness gives branches. Happiness is like a tree going into the sky, and sadness is like the roots going down into the womb of the earth. Both are needed, and the higher a tree goes, the deeper it goes, simultaneously. The bigger the tree, the bigger will be its roots. In fact, it is always in proportion. That’s its balance.” ~ Osho


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